Secondary Four lives have changed my life a lot I would say. I used to play computer everyday normally 2-3 hours per day but now I hardly touch the computer because I was too busy with my homework and also CCA. By the time I came home from school, it already 7.00pm plus. I really have to manage my time well. This year is a crucial year for me. I really have to buck up especially Physics. I used to like it but now I lost interest in it. Now here’s the thing.

SHOULD I CONTINUE WITH PURE PHYSICS? I want to continue but it seems that I kept failing test after test after exams after exams. This is making me crazy! It makes me feels that Physics is impossible to pass kind of thing. ‘O’ level!! There is 5 months more to my ever fist Mother Tongue paper. I am really very scared and nervous about it. Taking the result making me feels worried although I am not the one who takes the result slip this year. I can feel the sadness, I know what’s it’s like to have result that you do not want. I had this feeling before. I don’t want the ones I do not want. I want the ones that I want, I desire to have, the ones that I wanted in my whole life. It seems impossible, so far away. I want to get there. No matter how hard I strive I can’t get there. Did I not put enough effort? Did I not pay attention to teacher? Did I not understand the lessons? I have all sorts of feeling keeps stirring around me. Sometimes I feel sad for no reason or maybe there is a reason but I just don’t know how to express it. This year may be the unlucky year for me I guess? I hope not.

By the way, I will not be posting too often as mentions that I am very busy. Secondary four lives had changed me not a little but a lot.